It’s been a long time—too long—since I posted anything, and though there are several reasons why I simply couldn’t bring myself to write, the time has come to start again. At some point I’ll get into what exactly has been going on over the last year and a half, but for now I think it’s more important to talk about why I feel the need to re-launch my blog.
Obviously the most fundamental reason to continue is because of what I get out of writing. In many ways researching, reflecting and writing is a therapeutic exercise, an outlet where I can share my thoughts in a way that feels safe and permits me to let down my walls. When it comes to talking about my emotions, I often struggle to express myself adequately, though it got significantly easier when I created this blog and regularly posted. And having gone through an emotionally taxing period, I can say with certainty that I forewent a valuable means of dealing with the issues that had arisen in my life. Had I been writing the whole time it would have been easier to talk openly with the people around me—even if I hadn’t been posting the things I wrote.
And I like being more open with the people around me. I think it’s healthy, and I think so many interpersonal problems that can arise between individuals are rooted in a lack of communication and openness. Which brings me to the next reason why I feel the need to restart my blog.
When I originally started my blog I said that I wanted to write to encourage others to open up about sex, sexuality, gender, interpersonal relationships, etc. I believe that if I see our collective problem as a lack of communication, then I need to proactively address the issue by opening up myself. If I’m not willing to practice what I preach, then I’d best shut the fuck up.
If I want to encourage people to open up, it’s not enough for me to only post the good things. And while in the past I have shared some painful experiences, I can’t just write primarily about the fun times or about taboo topics. I also need to share the hard times, the hurtful times, the times when Pandora’s box seems to be completely empty. After all, those experiences are part of the human experience and thus also worthy of sharing on a blog focused on sex, relationships, and the vast sum of the human experience. I failed to do that and thus failed to live up to my own expectations, but the time is ripe to rectify that shortcoming.
And perhaps most decisive in the choice to write again is the fun of it all. Whether it’s a post about what’s going on in my life, things I read or thoughts on various topics, I always immensely enjoy the whole process. Therapeutic and fun—what could be better?
Regardless of what other people think about what I write, it feels fantastic to speak my mind and not hide behind walls. So get ready: Omni is back. 🙂