Tapping Ass in Taipei

A couple posts ago I said that for the most part I had outgrown one-night stands, but that on occasion I still enjoy a tryst with someone I don’t know, in particular when on holiday. Well, the first part of this year’s summer holiday took me to Taipei, where I had a fun experience with a local.

After a long day of exploring the city, the two friends I’m travelling with and I headed to our hotel to relax. Curious about what I would find, I logged into the wireless network and opened Blendr and Grindr on my phone. As usual, Blendr was a bust. And as usual, there were a lot of guys looking for fun on Grindr.

After chatting back and forth for two days with a bunch of guys, I focussed on two guys in particular. One was fucking hot and muscular; the other was toned but not as hot as the other – a 6.8 on a scale of 10 – but there was something about him that suggested he would make up for his average score by working to prove his abilities in bed.

I chose the latter over the hotter guy because hot people can get away with playing the run-around game prior to the date and being “lazy” in bed, whereas average people tend to be more direct and have to earn there keep in bed, which is why sometimes it pays off to pick the average person rather than the hot one when you want to get wild—especially when you don’t have a lot of time. That’s not always the case, but I was willing to take my chances since the hot guy was indeed playing the same game with me that I normally would have played with him.

The first problem arose when I tried to figure out where I needed to go. V. told me the metro stop I needed to reach and what his address was, sending me his location on the map in Grindr so I could better navigate. But when I asked him what his flat number was so I knew where to buzz, he told me that his flat number was the same as his street address.

I thought we might be dealing with a language issue since I don’t speak any Chinese and his English was not very good. So I tried to verify that his street address and flat number where identical, and he seemed to confirm that.

I bid my friends adieu and headed for the metro, excited to explore a different part of the city. I find hook ups are a good way to get out and see areas outside of the touristy places. There is also something to the adventure involved in getting there, particularly when you don’t speak the local language. The sex becomes a reward for a job well done, and the journey there is half the fun.

I didn’t want to pay the roaming charges for using the map app on my iPhone, so I took a screenshot before I left, figuring that would be good enough. Boy, was I wrong.

At first I thought I knew where I was going; I wound my way through the streets from the metro station to the place where V.’s “giant building” should have been according to the pinpoint on the map V. had sent me. Along the way I discovered one of Taipei’s many night markets and had a look around, but once I got to where I thought I needed to be I realised I didn’t have a fucking clue where I was going.

Suddenly it became an even greater adventure. I quickly learned that Taipei seems to have main streets with side “lanes” that have the same name as their respective main street and a lane number. I could see that the main street was north of the pinpoint on the map and thus assumed that the 180 was not the street address but rather the lane number.

Unable to find the place on my own, I started asking people on the street for help. But no one spoke English, not to mention that I didn’t have a whole map, only a rectangular screenshot to work with. Using hand gestures I got people to show me where we were on the map, only to find that the locals also couldn’t really figure out where we were on the small map. One woman wouldn’t even give me the time of day, briskly shooing me away when I approached her.

An hour later I was still looking, and I was losing hope. I had no phone number to call and didn’t want to activate 3G on my iPhone. With no other alternatives, I considered heading back to the metro station with a full sack.

But then I bumped into one last guy. He was a godsend: not only did he point me in the right direction, he walked me over to the main street and pointed out the building to me. I was there! As it turned out the pinpoint was inaccurate and I had been looking for his building in the wrong place. I grumbled in annoyance, but shrugged it off as part of the adventure.

However, that wasn’t the end.

Inside the building I bumped into two security guards who asked where I was heading. I tried to explain that I was looking for flat 180 but they thought I was referring to the street address, which was also 180. After some elaborate hand signs and a trip to the mailboxes with the security guards it turned out that there was no flat number 180. There was 179 and 181, but no 180. Fuck.

Luckily, V. had unimaginatively used his first initial and last name as his nickname on Grindr. A quick glance told me all I needed to know, and the security guards got in touch with the guy who lived in flat 579.

Why the hell did he tell me he lived in 180?!? Maybe the average looking guy has less than average intelligence, I thought, and I should have gone with the hot guy who had played coy.

But I’ve already gone through the trouble to get to this goddamn place, so after getting cleared by security I head up to his flat. I’m 191cm, so the first thing that greeted me was a knock on the head when I walked into his flat and met his low ceiling. After making my apologies for being ridiculously late, I asked if I could take a shower—I was completed covered in sweat. A quick shower later, we made our way into V.’s room, where the ceiling could accommodate my height.

My intuition had been correct; V. was out to prove something and attacked my cock with a vengeance. “Your cock so big,” he moaned as he threw his legs over my shoulder, braced himself on the wall and pushed eagerly into my thrusting dick.

But as soon as we started to sweat, he stopped. Confused, I pulled out of him at his insistence and watched in wonder as he jumped out of bed to turn up the air conditioning. This wouldn’t have been so unusual if it had only happened once. But every time we started to sweat again, he would stop, ratchet up the air conditioning and even handed me a hand towel to wipe off the sweat. At some point he declared that it was too hot and we would have to take a cigarette break. Um, if you say so, dude…

But over all, he was a good lay. After we finished, I took another shower and got dressed. We chatted for a bit and then V. called me a taxi. The ride home was great; I got to see Taipei 101 lit up at night (which was disappointing, but at least I saw it) and observe how active the city was in the early hours. Going out for a fuck gave me a chance to see parts of Taipei I would have never seen otherwise, and despite how annoying it can be in the moment, I actually enjoy getting lost in a new city. Especially when the carrot for finding myself again is a roll in the sack with a tight ass that’s hungry for my cock.

After the fact, I’m curious how typical this experience was. Do people in Taipei generally insist on turning on the air conditioning and wiping up sweat during sex, or was this just V.’s idiosyncrasy? I know it’s hot and humid in Taipei, but his behaviour seemed a bit excessive to me since I think it’s hot to get all sweaty. Anyone from or spend a lot of time in Taipei? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this.

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